WHEN SWIMMING ISN’T WINNING…

There are few ideas I’ve had that are worse than deciding to take both kids swimming by myself. Choosing to neck a jar of pickled onions during a serious case of the midnight munchies and proceeding to puke them up all night comes in a close second, along with convincing two mates to do three tequila shots before our first spin class, but swimming with the kids is definitely, definitely, the worst. Continue reading

I WANNA SEX YOU UP (BUT I’M A BIT TIRED)

How hard is sex these days?! I mean really. I’m amazed that anyone ever has another baby. Not because of the crying or the lack of cash or sleep but because finding time and energy to have actual real-life sex is so, so, so hard. Deciding to have sex is like waking up at 6.00am, hearing the rain piss down outside, anxiously checking the monitor and breathing a sigh of relief when the Small is still sleeping and thinking, “I know, I’ll get up and go for a run.” It’s just that, when you’re so tired and busy and well, really really tired, there’s just a million other things to do first. Continue reading

RESENTMENT IS POISON

Resentment is a pretty damn dangerous emotion to give in to but one that, as parents, we inevitably have to deal with at some point, on some level. Some very selfless people may be able to banish any resentful thoughts as soon as they raise their ugly little heads, but most of us fall victim to this insidious little soul-worm occasionally. Continue reading

DAD-BASHING IS BORING

Good news. The sisterhood is booming. There’s less and less competition and more and more acceptance and support. This warms my cockles and gives me warm fuzzy feelings in my tummy. Unfortunately, our goodwill is not stretching far enough. Some mamas are leaving our boy-shaped partners out in the cold and being, well, douchebags.
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A FAT LOT OF GOOD ENOUGH…

Sometimes I lean on my kitchen tops with my head in my hands, the heels of my palms pushing into my eyes and wonder what kind of higher power would make this whole motherhood thing so hard. Then, I pour myself a glass of wine, put a bit of red lipstick on and get the fuck on with it all because you know what? I’m too busy worrying about being an awesome mama that I often forget that for 99.99% of the time, you just need to be good enough. Continue reading

One Year On…

A year ago today I was overcome with a sudden desire to set up a blog. I’d had other blogs but they were pretty shit and totally lacking in any kind of direction. This time last year though, I had an eight month old Small and I was starting to think two things: first, that I was beginning to resemble and recognise parts of my old self and two…this ‘becoming a momma’ thing needed to be talked about.  Continue reading