As a Yorkshire girl, born of a working class, coal mining-town mum and a hugely privileged but emotionally repressed white man, spirituality wasn’t high on the list of conversation topics in our house. They’re both exceptional humans - I love them deeply - but emotional strength was commanded rather than nurtured. It’s just what they knew and, until a few years ago, it was all I knew too.

I’m not religious. It’s not the framework that works for me. But, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned to welcome the ‘woo-woo’ into my life. Woo-woo is a catch-all phrase I use to describe all that stuff that some call faith, some call God, some call manifesting, some call the universe, some call energy…you get the picture.

I consider myself spiritual, highly intuitive, empathic. (I also consider myself egotistical, impulsive, controlling and overbearing…but we are focussing on the good shit today). I don’t pray but I meditate. I don’t speak to God; I speak to the universe. I don’t wear a cross, but I do love a crystal. I don’t read the Bible, but I read books about philosophy, therapy, recovery. I don’t have a congregation I can go to, but I have a fellowship, a friendship group, a family that I use for support and strength. I believe in manifestation and while I don’t have ‘faith’, I believe that there is something bigger, better, bolder than me which will keep me safe if I use that belief to continually accept that I am not the be all and end all.

(If this stuff generally weirds you out - I get it but I bear with me.)

So, while I’m not religious, I recognise that my approach to life is no different to those who are. We are a generation largely disaffected with the church-based construct of religion but we’re also a generation that has reached out for something to replace it, whether we’ve done it consciously or not. We’ve recognised the need to look beyond ourselves for strength, courage and support.

It’s easy to dismiss the woo-woo. But when I meditate I’m giving myself time out. I’m taking 5 minutes to remove myself from the crazy so that I can be a better person on the other side. When I grab a crystal, I’m using a tangible thing - something I can feel, touch and see - to focus my mind on something. When I journal, I’m externalising a ton of shit-gubbins that, left inside will do no good. When I manifest, I’m not just asking for what I want, but programming my mind to make decisions consciously and subconsciously to help me get there.

I guess the point of this is: if you’re struggling, or feeling slow or stuck or alone or fucking fed up but you also feel like all of this woo-woo stuff is a crock of shit then don’t think of it as magical fuckery. Think of it as a set of tools to help you slow down, focus, rest, recover and consider. Without anything, we’re just ploughing through life with no direction or belief that good stuff, or the right stuff, can happen and that’s a shit place to be.

If you’re like I was - a bit ‘northern’ about it, dismissive, eye-rolley - then try this one thing and if it doesn’t help in any way then I promise I’ll never ask you to do another goddam thing ever:

Write a list of everything you can think of that you want in life. This list is not limited by ‘reality’. It’s also not just about big, grand and righteous things. It’s about everything. It’s a list of potentially hundreds of things. From world peace, to the sudden and extremely painful death of Putin (too political?!) to a new handbag, to a personal trainer to baked beans for breakfast every day, to a holiday every year, to an orgasm on Friday…anything. Forget any financial restraints, or geographical limitations etc. Just write down stuff you want in life if you could construct it any way you wanted to. Take your time. It may take an hour, a week, a month…longer. But do it and keep adding to it. That’s it. That’s all you have to do. Let me know how it makes you feel.

See you on the other side. I’ll make Friday’s letter a little lighter!

Cat x