I recently found myself in a funk. I’ve written about the ups and downs of adulthood and specifically parenting for a while now and it suddenly occurred to me that I wasn’t that great on the follow through…so to speak.
I talk a lot about the what – the anxiety, the stress, the joy, the humour – but rarely about the ‘how’. I don’t seem to take time to share my tips and tricks for dealing with all those plates and, while I don’t pretend to have the answers, there are a few things that help me get back on top of shit.
- RETAIL THERAPY
It’s not clever or big but treating yourself to something lovely is often a nice way to kick start your better days. It doesn’t have to be expensive, but it can be if you want it to be. Things that ALWAYS work for me are: a new notebook, a pair of jammies, a takeaway.
- TALKING TO MY HUSBAND
It may sound silly but I’m not sure I do this enough. I had to sit him down and say, “I’m struggling and I need you to help me out. All I want to do is get the work done that I need to do and squeeze in some yoga. Oh and can we watch Stranger Things together because everyone is going on about how good it is? With a take away?”
- HOT YOGA
Fuck, I mean I know it isn’t everyone’s cup of calming tea, but it really works for me. The heat, the intensity all serve to make my manic mind quieten the fuck down and because the heat makes me so bendy, I actually look like I can do yoga. I never really want to go, but I never regret going. Bit like sex actually…and the opposite of having a take away.
It’s really easy to make excuses about why you can’t go to bed early. There’s housework, it’s ‘your’ time (I get this, I really do!), you can work in peace, you need to knit a map of the world for your kids’ geography project but, honestly, all that shit can wait, and even just one or two early nights can make all the difference.
All the lists. A list makes me feel calm in a way that, I imagine, valium and a scotch would. If it’s organised on paper, I don’t have to wrestle with it bouncing around my brain. Plus, I bloody love a chance to bust out the colourful sharpies and spend twenty minutes writing a list that looks pretty too. It’s not a waste of time, it’s mindfulness and when you’re done you can reward yourself with a take away.
- SHIT TV
Let’s just get something straight here: just because I watch shit TV doesn’t make me a bad person. I will watch all the Real Housewives, and all the Love Island and all the Made In Chelsea I want. It doesn’t mean I’m perpetuating an unhealthy obsession with irrelevant people, I’m not setting a bad example to my kids, I’m not responsible in some small way for the decline of culture in our society…I’M JUST REALLY TIRED and I don’t have the energy to figure out which character is which in Game of Thrones. Also, shit TV is great with…a take away.